Learn to shave down your texts to the atomic level. Any character that can be taken out of your text without changing its meaning or without making you look stupid should be plucked out. Not all your texts should be atomized, but it’s the best way to express your thoughts in the least reactive way. Atomize your texts when setting up logistics, exchanging information, or punishing bad behavior.
When atomizing your texts, consider what can be inferred from context. Your ultimate goal is to communicate a thought, feeling or piece of information. Keep reducing down the character count as long as your goal continues to be fulfilled.
As an exercise, try to communicating the following thoughts by using atomic level texts:
A: Don’t worry about our bar options, there should be a large number of bars open for us to choose from tonight
B: It’s k, lot of bars gonna b open
A: Should we grab food before we go to the concert?
B: Eat before concert?
A: Hey! Are you still available to meet tonight?
B: Hey, up for tonight?
A: I have some friends coming down from Los Angeles and I’m going to party with them tonight
B: Gonna party with LA friends tonight
A: The meeting time you just proposed works out perfectly for me
A: Why did you leave so early last night?
B: Left early?
A: Have you ever been to that new club on University ave?
B: Been to new uni ave club?
A: When are you coming to town tomorrow?
B: When in town tomorrow?
A: I don’t understand why you just said that
A: I don’t like mexican food, I think we should go somewhere else for dinner
B: Not into mex, somewhere else
Clearly, atomizing leads to many abbreviations, misspellings and poor grammar, but they will work to your advantage. There’s a range of erroneous writing that’s considered acceptable in mobile texting that will make you appear lazy as opposed to illiterate. Lazy texting is high status because it’s unreactive. A higher status guy wouldn’t bother mustering the energy and focus it takes to type an unnecessary character with fingerpoint accuracy. Bewarned, poor quality writing is less excusable the easier your texting utensil is to use.
A text conversation isn’t a piece of literary work, it’s not a contextless unit of information you can fully understand just by reading its words and emojis. To correctly read text conversations you must consider the context. Each text can mean something different depending on its context. Use context to analyze your texts the same way you’d analyze an in-person conversation by considering body language, location, time-of-day and clothes.
Here’s a list of questions you should answer to help build the context for understanding your text conversations:
Who sent the first text?
Men traditionally make the first approach, but not always the first move. Women will sometimes extend a subtle invitation for men to approach in the form of a quick glance or smile. These days, women make the first move by swiping your Tinder card right or giving you 4-5 stars on okcupid or winking at you in match.com… the list goes on. What’s uncommon is a first move in the form of a text. Normally, this means your dating market value is higher.
What’s your goal?
Are you trying to build attraction or comfort? Was the text designed to punish or reward her behavior? Every text should have a purpose and should be judged accordingly. If the text didn’t fulfill it’s purpose, try to figure out why. Whether she understood your intent or not, a failed text you expected to work shouldn’t happen and you should try to resolve your confusion.
What are the time delays like?
Everyone loves to hate time delays. No, my bad, only lower status text gamers hate it. They’re like dogs waiting for the mailman, restlessly preoccupied with their asynchronous delivery. There’s an acceptable time delay range that doesn’t mean too much if it’s consistent. Divergences in delay patterns are significant and could mean she’s punishing, rewarding, unavailable to respond, disinterested or interested. Another significant sign of interest is if she double texts with any time delay longer than a minute.
Who’s text blocks are bigger?
Character for character, regardless of meaning or substance, text block size matters. The smaller her text blocks are relative to yours, the more likely she’s losing interest. Text block size is similar to time delays. Divergences in block size pattern can signal interest or disinterest.